Posted 4 hours ago

shadowgorawr:

lets play “how gay can you be with your best friend without it getting weird” 

(Source: pgrls)

Posted 4 hours ago

totallynotmisha:

2002bape:

YOOOO SO LOOK DA FIRST TIME I EVER GOT ON DIS RIDE I WAS WITH A WHITE FAMILY AND U KNOW WHITE FOLKS CRAZY SO DEY DONT FEAR ROLLER COASTERS OR DEATH IN GENERAL. AFTER ABOUT 10 MINUTES OF TELLIN DEM DAT I DIDNT WANNA GET ON I FINALLY SAID YES CUZ I AINT NEVER BEEN NO BITCH AND I DIDNT PLAN ON STARTING THAT DAY. WHEN DA ENGINEER SAID “PLS LEAN BACK AND KEEP THE BACK OF UR HEAD PRESSED AGAINST YOUR SEAT” AND I SAW EVERYBODY STICK DA BACK OF THEIR HEADS TO THE CHAIR I KNEW DAT I MADE DA WORST DECISION OF MY LIFE CUZ I EVEN SAW SOME BLACK FOLKS LISTEN AND U KNOW DAT WHEN BLACK PEOPLE LISTEN A WHITE LADY’S ADVICE , ITS DA REAL DEAL. SO MY FIRST MISTAKE WAS REFUSING TO PRESS MY HEAD AGAINST THE SEAT… THE RIDE TAKES OFF AND MY DOME SLAMS AGAINST THE CHAIR WHILE MY NECK SNAPPED… UNCONSCIOUS INSTANTLY.. WHEN I AWOKE FROM MY 3 SECOND SLUMBER WE HAD REACHED DA VERY TOP OF THE RIDE WHERE THE RIDE MAKES A QUICK PAUSE… WHEN THE RIDE MADE THAT PAUSE I OPENED MY EYES CAUSE I THOUGHT THE RIDE WAS OVER AND WE ALL MADE IT SAFELY. BOY WAS I WRONG… I OPENED MY EYES AND DA ONLY THING I SAW WAS A 300 FOOT DROP STRAIGHT TO DA GROUND SO I SAID “GOD YOU CANT LET ME DIE LIKE DIS”. I THINK I SUFFERED A HEART CONTUSION CUZ MY HEART JUST COMPLETELY STOPPED BEATING… AND THAN THE RIDE TAKES OFF AGAIN… WE MAKE THE 300 FOOT DROP AND I SCREAM MY LUNGS OUT AS IM SCARED TO DEATH BECAUSE DA ONLY TIME A HUMAN SHOULD BE DAT HIGH IN DA AIR IS WHEN THEIR SPIRIT IS BEING SUCKED INTO HEAVEN BY DA GRACE OF GOD.. SO WE SAFELY MAKE IT TO DA END OF DA RIDE AND WHEN WE GET OFF I STUMBLE OUT OF THE SEAT CUZ MY LEGS WENT NUMB AND ALL THE AIR WAS SUCKED OUT OF MY BODY SO I COULDNT TALK EITHER.. DA FIRST THING THESE CRAZY MOTHERFUCKERS TELL ME IS “HEY MAN LETS DO THAT AGAIN THAT WAS WICKED”. I LOOKED AT DEM AND I REALIZED DAT DIS WHITE KID DAT I BEFRIENDED WAS ACTUALLY SATAN. I NO LONGER HAVE ANY WHITE FRIENDS.

please read this whole thing.

(Source: cali-cocaine)

Posted 4 hours ago
Posted 4 hours ago

moosezekiel:

pilgrimstateofmind:

ATTENTION FOR A SECOND, YO: 

Real talk, this animal (the Ordovician Helmet crab, aka the Horseshoe crab, aka the Atlantic’s most at-risk shelled animal) is of a species that is close to 450 million years old. They are considered endangered, and often wash up on the shores of Long Island (this big lady crab was at TR park in Oyster Bay)

Note: these animals are often used to extract their blue blood and cure diseases. They help the ocean out big time. And they are one of the longest-surviving species on the planet. They’re washing up and people don’t think to/are scared to save them because of their deceivingly harmless barbs. 

Take note, friends. Their barbs are NOT stingers. They cannot hurt you. Their pinchers aren’t pinchers, they’re just little legs that are actually really soft! The barb tail they have is actually what they use to stick into the ocean floor or the sand when waves knock them over or they flip onto their backs by accident. And you can help them out by flipping them back over very quickly and helping them scuttle back into the water if you see them struggling. 

This is way important. Just call me the Sarah McLachlan of horseshoe crabs.

save the Kabuto

Posted 4 hours ago

sweaterbitches:

animalaspects:

animalaspects:

Here are some wonderful facts about Sea World’s orcas!

  • The average lifespan of wild orcas ranges from 30-50 years, although some females can easily make it past 80 (a wild orca named J2 or ‘Granny’ is 103 this year!). The lifespan of a Sea World orca is around 25 years, the median age being 9. But at least they put on a good show!
  • Don’t worry, collapsed dorsal fins are a common condition, although in the wild only sick or injured orcas have collapsed dorsal fins. All of Sea World’s males and some females have it, it makes them look unique! 
  • The size of Sea World’s tanks compared to an orca is about the same as a human to a bathtub. Lot’s of room to stretch and move!
  • Wild orcas swim 100+ miles a day, they would have to swim around their tank 1,400+ times a day to achieve that. But that seems like a lot of work, and you may see the animals hanging out near the surface of the water or on the bottoms of their tanks for hours. That’s a lot more relaxing than swimming all those miles!
  • Sea World gives their orcas a Valium-like drug to stop the whales from acting aggressively towards each other and to numb their minds from their vastly uninteresting concrete tanks. Buying a ticket to Sea World is an excellent way to help them pay for these drugs that they pump their animals full with!
  • Many captive orcas show abnormal behaviors like head bobbing, chewing on concrete, and self mutilation by banging their heads into the side of the tank. Obviously just temper-tantrums! Silly things.
  • In the wild, there has been only one orca attack. Bad orca! While in captivity, there have been over 100 attacks and 4 deaths. These animals just need more training, it couldn’t possibly be related to their confinement! 
  • Food is used as reinforcement for tricks. Do a trick, get your dinner. Don’t want to do a trick? I guess you don’t eat tonight you stubborn thing! 

See? Sea World isn’t as bad as people make it out to be! Oh, one more fact: for every $1,000,000 Sea World makes, about $600 goes into conservation efforts (about $0.5 a ticket). I’m so glad they care about conservation of the ocean! Amazing work!

Sources: (x) (x) (x) (x)

If you haven’t realized it yet, this post is 100% sarcastic. It should be obvious, but not everyone understands sarcasm…

Please don’t let this die

God this is so fucked up I want to cry

Posted 4 hours ago
Posted 5 hours ago

taxiderby:

Super Smash Bros has been around for 15 years and it’s all because Mario decided to be a piece of shit and ruin everything

Posted 5 hours ago

lrnmortalhd:

whatisacomputer:

Burn it with fire

five nights at freddy’s is such a great game

Posted 5 hours ago

skylordlysander:

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bird school for Brids

Posted 5 hours ago